living together-ness

I have been surrounded lately by folks who have decided to live together before or instead of marriage. At first I was angered...and justly so. But now I realize that my anger came only from my inability to perceptualize like them (a word I made up that means 'to see through their eyes'). I mean to give no justification for cohabitation. What I am realizing is that there is such a hunger for acceptance and community that is not being met in people today that these hurting folks are turning to unholy unions with others to find both of the missing pieces from their lives. It is my hope, and I believe the plan from God as described in the Bible, that people would find these two first in a relationship with God, secondly in a relationship with God's Church, and thirdly in relationships with those not in God's Church (When I say God's Church I mean all people who are living in a relationship with God and meeting together. I do not mean a specific 'church' as is commonly understood in Western culture).

I fear that we the Church have focused so much on finding, pointing out, and eliminating sins that we have alienated the sinner. We have forgotten that we ALL are sinners who can ONLY be saved by Grace which comes ONLY from God. Jesus loves the sinners. Don't forget that. Jesus does not love you more simply because you love him more. He loves that gay-communist-leftist-environmentalist-whateverist just as much as he loves holy-saint-you.

Now back to living together-My plea to the church is that we remember to have compassion on those who are living this chosen lifestyle. Remember that God does not see cohabitation as the culmination of all abominable sins (desanctifying marriage, fornication, adultery, etc.) rather, God looks at the people and has compassion on them as Jesus did so so many times in the Gospels.

Consider this: how many more times did Jesus compassionately reach out to the lost than he congratulated the found?

9:1

I have heard it said that one must say nine nice and uplifting things to make up for one misplaced negative thing. I am living in that reality right now.

I just finished leading another great Wednesday night youth group service. It wasn't great because of me. In fact, I realize that I was so busy with paperwork and details that I missed out on many great things, but it was great because God was there. I am excited as I see the way that God is working with the 789s ministry.

After youth group I noticed a couple from the Sr High youth group hanging out in the parking lot and decided that the youth pastor-ly thing to do would be to go talk to them and pretend that I was just there to talk so that they would see that they were really not the only two people in the world. Of course, when they saw me they exchanged a quick hug and he walked away. The girl was standing by her car with a very upset look on her face.

I guess I should give some background...about the past year (since she left the 789 ministry and entered Sr. High ministry) this girl has seemed upset with me. I have talked with the Sr. High leader and have spent time in prayer and sat down and just tried to think for a time back on anything I could have said/done to upset her like this. I have nothing.

So back to tonight...I decided that since no one else was in ear-shot but people were still all around us that it would be an appropriate time to ask her if she was upset with me. Of course she said 'no'. I explained to her that it is very easy for me to say things without thinking about them first and sometimes it can hurt peoples' feelings to which she said 'yep' and got in her car and left.

I worry that the same fate my sister chose is one that she may consider. My sister used one misplaced statement by a youth leader as an excuse to leave the church and begin a relationship of sin. Unfortunately it doesn't matter what the youth leader shares with her or if she apologizes all day, my sister will not forgive her. I keep a few pictures of my little sister from her youth group days in my office as a reminder that it can be ANYONE who is turned away from morality and sensibility because of the power of the tongue.